Written by: Peter Coombs

Spies

During the 1970s, I was a member of the Bristol Vice & Drugs Squad.
On one occasion, colleagues Dave, Terry, myself, and others were sent to raid a hotel room in Clifton. We arrived and found a man and a woman with six or seven suitcases about to depart.

The information was that they were in possession of a significant amount of cannabis resin. Upon arrival—although the man immediately declared the case containing the drugs—we explained we were obliged to search the other suitcases.

As Terry went through one of them, he produced an unusual item of equipment. He questioned the man as to the nature and use of the object. The man responded in a heavily accented French voice, "C’est un sexual aide."
Terry produced a second item and was again informed, "C’est un sexual aide."
Terry continued and produced a third odd-looking piece of equipment and viewed the man questioningly. The man, indignant by this time, responded, "C’est un autre sexual aide. Is this really necessary?"
Terry then remarked, "Stone me, after this lot you’ll need First Aid!"

In summary, the woman was French and wrote film scripts, while the man was an Iranian travelling on a French passport.

The following morning, Terry and I took the Iranian to court, where he pleaded guilty to possession and was fined.
He paid the fine and stated how kindly Terry and I had dealt with him. He was pleased to offer us a financial reward by way of thanks. We politely declined but led him into Bridewell, where we witnessed him place some money into the Widow & Orphans Box.

It transpired that he was a spy being monitored by all the Western Security Services—and I have no doubt, on later reflection, that the operation and our actions were set up by MI6. But, of course, I have no proof.